A Fortnight of Lust

Day #6: Kiss of Death by Amber Averay

I wish I was strong,

I fight to belong

But contentment is never mine.

I watch others gleam

As if life is a dream

And wish my own were as fine.

Is wishing for fools,

A fantasist’s tools –

Something I should deny?

I want to be free,

Fulfilled and happy,

Not watching joy pass me by.

I should seize the day,

Carve a new way,

Create the life I need.

Because fear suffocates

And doubt formulates

As misery seeks to feed.

Change my perception,

Deceive the deception,

Assure myself I am brave.

Worthy and strong

And deserve to belong,

Accept the happiness I crave.

Being a witness to living

Is just the beginning

Of failing to exist at all.

But step by step

I can start to respect

It’s safe to rise after a fall.

Don’t wish and do naught

Or your days will be fraught

With regrets and bitterness strong.

Change my perspective

And see how effective

It helps to feel to belong.

If I see myself well

I can escape my own hell

And cherish with every dawn

The new life I’ve created;

Embrace feeling elated,

Step out as if new born.

But pessimism endures,

And I feel insecure,

But will fight with every breath

To keep positivity of mind

And leave far behind

The beckoning kiss of death.